Easy hack for keeping your shower clean

Dad loves to shower. Once in the morning. Once at night.

And he likes to sing, too.

No shower is shorter than a half hour.

But this time was odd.

I passed by the bathroom door and heard him singing more enthusiastically than usual.

Forty-five minutes later, I passed the same door, and he was still there. Still singing.

Odd, that.  Continue reading “Easy hack for keeping your shower clean”

DIY Rabbit Lawnmower

Yeah. You totally heard that right.

Dad made a lawnmower out of rabbits.

I guess he got sick of the gas-guzzling hunk ‘o junk we used to use to cut the lawn. And, not coincidentally, he got sick of paying for rabbit feed.

Do I smell a win, win, win?

Totally.

Bunnies cut the lawn. Win.

Bunnies get fed. Win.

Bunnies fertilize the lawn. Win.  Continue reading “DIY Rabbit Lawnmower”

woodstove update

Woodstove update

I’ve got bad news. And more bad news. And more. And maybe some good news? We shall see.

First the bad news.

The stove don’t fit.

Suck.

So much for our $75 solution. 

Second bit of bad news: mom won’t let dad install it himself. Here is a snippet of their conversation (from memory). Continue reading “Woodstove update”

DIY bow and arrow for kids

DIY bow and arrow for the kids

The following conversation occurred between me and Dad, then me and Dan. (Dad was a bit too grumpy to interview, as you’ll see). This took place on December 23, 2016 as Dan was constructing the bows for his kids for Christmas. This was before he decided to chop off his thumb. 

*

What you got, Dad?

Wood. Leave me alone.

Care to elaborate?

No.

What you making?

[silence]. 

Dad?

[Dad grabs my voice recorder and tosses it in the scrap wood pile.]

We’ll catch up later.  Continue reading “DIY bow and arrow for the kids”

when a sawstop fails

When a Sawstop Can’t Save You

My brother is an idiot.

It happened on Saturday. He and his oldest son were in the garage ripping thin strips of wood as spacers for the log they just milled (blog post forthcoming). The wood he was ripping was a bit damp, after being left in the rain a few days before. It was scrap wood, after all. No need to cut the finest.

First mistake.

Dan (my brother) was in Dad’s shop, using Dad’s tablesaw–a Sawstop. The only tablesaw on the market that has the capacity to detect flesh. Within milliseconds of an electrical interruption, a brake cartridge is launched at rocket speeds into the blade–immediately retracting the blade beneath the tablesaw. Countless people have told stories about how the sawstop saved a hand, or a thumb, or a finger. Continue reading “When a Sawstop Can’t Save You”

DIY mail organizer from wood

Wood mail organizer

Have any of ya’ll moved recently?

It’s hell. One thing we didn’t realize before the move was that in your last house, you spend years getting more and more organized.

And then you have to start all over.

For Mom and Dad (who had lived for decades in that old house), it nearly upended them (maritally speaking). For two old quacks used to knowing exactly where such and such is, they about died of heart failure.

So, Dad’s first task was to build something that could hold the mail, wallets, and keys.

“How soon you want it?” Dad asked mom.

“Yesterday.”

“Alright,” he said. “It ain’t gonna be pretty, but I’ll be back in an hour.”

He came back six hours later.  Continue reading “Wood mail organizer”

How to make bouillon powder from broth

How to make bouillon powder from broth

Dad’s always thinking TEOTWAWKI (The end of the world as we know it) is imminent. EMP. Financial crisis. Terrorist attack. Sun flares. Zombies. You name it, Dad’s thought of it.

As a natural consequence of this mentality, he’s constantly adding to his food storage stockpile. 

So, with that background, here’s a conversation we had on January 3, 2017. (From memory).  Continue reading “How to make bouillon powder from broth”

How to get bunnies to mate-1

What to do when doe bunnies don’t…ehem, respond?

We got our bunnies off of craigslist about three months ago. We were really hoping to have some meat and pelts by about this point. But all we’ve got is a whole lotta spilled hey and even more poop.

No baby bunnies. (That we know of…they’ve burrowed under our compost pile and we suspect they’re participating in all sorts of unsavory mischievousness down there).

We keep “palpitating” the bunnies to see if they’re “with bunny,” but can’t seem to see any signs. When we lock the buck and the doe in a cage together, he chases her around, pisses on her, and she just runs and runs.

So, we’ve got a doe problem. Continue reading “What to do when doe bunnies don’t…ehem, respond?”

How to restore a cast-iron woodstove

It turns out firewood needs to be burned to produce heat.

Go figure.

We’ve only been here in the Northeast for a few months. One of the first projects dad wanted to do was install a fireplace insert or cast-iron woodstove into the existing brick fireplace. Continue reading “How to restore a cast-iron woodstove”

four ways to lose weight for gentleman

Four ways to lose weight, for gentlement

A little background: in the last six months, dad has lost 45 pounds. He went from minorly obese to his high school weight. Over dinner one evening, I interviewed him to find out his secret. 

So what’s your weight loss secret?

Burn more calories than you consume. It’s just simple math, son.

Yeah, but how did you stay motivated?

Motivation’s got noithing to do with it. Just eat less than your body burns.

Then why did it take you forty years to lose it?

[silence]

Fine. So motivation does have something to do with it.

So? Continue reading “Four ways to lose weight, for gentlement”